update.

Hurt

A silent tear falls to the ground

A silent tear comes crashing down

Small it falls with out a sound

I cant believe what I have found

If more come I know I’ll drown

Every time I turn around

New troubles surround

Once friendly faces now frown

They stand; astound

No way to rebound

This is not widely renowned

But this pain is profound

New found freedom

Oh wow, a night off. Nothing to do finally after weeks of homework hardship. haha. what will i do with my new found freedom you ask? Well i'll tell you just that, whatever the heck i want! i'm pumped for my night off, but i will prolly just keep it simple and go to a friends house. As you can tell, i'm a bit over excited, i just haven't had a nothing day in a long time.

I feel my nothing day is earned anyway, because today i took one of the hardest tests of my life, i'll let you know how that turned out, good i hope.

OOOOH and i got my new homecoming dress. Picture will be posted soon, tonight maybe. I love it, and getting dressed up, but i really don't like dances. The club atmosphere is a bit weird for me, but if i don't go to like every formal one, everyone whines about it. But then again, it's my fault in the end for conforming to the whole dance craze.... but i'm still really physicked about my loverly dress. Oh yeah and i'm sure my hair will look amazing ;) loovvve yaaaa ( u know who i'm talkin too hee,hee)

but for now thats the extent to my life right now, school and when a get a spare minute, i like to just relax.

overwhelmed

I've got a lot on my plate right now for a teenager, i just need your prayers big time. But i am still here.

in other news, homecoming is coming up, i'm pumped.

but basically i have a buttload to do tonight and i need to get on that, so i'll talk to you later. hopefully post more than a few sentences.

What's new

School is back in session.. it's not too bad. I love all the people!! Just not so much the work geometry is a BEAST! haha most teachers take the word "honors" lightly, but not this teacher. It seems more like a college class, you HAVVE to pay attention or she will call on you, you will be completely lost ( b/c she moves so fast) , and when you say the wrong answer everyone will think you are retarded. I'm pretty worried about this class, its deff nothing to just breeze by. And next semester when i get out, i am right back in to honors alg 2 with the same teacher. Fun, Fun, Fun.

The ladies retreat is nearing, i know my sign language,, but the skit =? no clue. I have to get on that, it's this weekend. So another thing i have to get.

Brother up date: We are SOO much closer than we were before. We went on vaca this last weekend, and when we were gone, he put his arms around me and his daughter and said "My two girls". I thought that was really sweet and hopefully we will be really close as time goes on, and the age difference gap closes.

On the boyfriend side, he is the sweetest thing ever! But this is high school and relationships come and go like that. It was 5 months on the 2nd yay =)

So my life not too interesting, right now because i am consumed with school, but if you dont like it dont read it ;-)
I'll leave on that note.

Everything at once

So it's been a while since i've posted anything so, get ready for everything.

The trip went amazing. My brother came and we got even closer. We went to the zoo and the aquarium it was nice , but i'm good with the animals for a few years. Next year definatly a theme park, I lover roller coasters. But all in all it was a really good trip.

The week after the trip,, i had surgery . Minor surgery but still, it's still kinda a big deal for me. I had to be put to sleep and receive my first IV =/. I was such a wimp, the anesthesiologists gave me a numbing shot first. It was very kind. This is my third day of recovery and it was the worst, it was very hard to breath because they had to shove a breathing tube down my throat. My chest hurt and i had a fever. Hopefully it's all uphill from here =] .

School!!!!!!! ahhh! Yes another year of high school in all its glory(drama haha) is up ahead. Today was actually my last firday of freedom, yeah it sucks. Tomorrow i am off to "back to school clothes shopping", which is always the funnest part of back to school. So wish me luck as i take on a horribly overloading schedule, for real my social life is GONE. This will be one hard year, but hopefully it will pay off in the end. But i am PUMPED to see my friends and my boyfriend everyday! So again WISH ME LUCK!

That's it for now, check out the new song of the week, it's very pretty. (plus i can play it on piano woot!)

OHH
P.S. my brother got his papers from the divorce, it's not going to be as peaceful as i thought. She is suing for sole custody. Pray for us, all we want is joint so he can at least see his kids, but the wife has a very manipulative mother and won't just leave it at "Mom we want to make this as easy as possible". And a daughter willing to give in to her mother at the slightest suggestion.

PUMPED!

So My trip is coming up and i am super pumped! Like I said i love to take trips with my youth group, and i hope it is amazing. Yes i know i am telling you this again, but there is one little adjustment to my youth trip, my big brother is coming along. I know, i had to ask myself if that was a good thing, because of our awkward relationship. I have come to the conclusion that it is a very good thing, i hope he makes friends with some super cool Christian people and they will keep him out of trouble. And like i said i'll let you know how it goes.

In other news, I actually have some church responsibility (a little, but still some.) The ladies retreat is coming up, and my youth leader and her mother do the special services. So my youth leaders mother asks her to sing a song, and my youth leader asks some girls from the youth group to learn some sign language. So thats pretty awesome.

In addition to me doing sign language with the other girls, my youth leader asked if i could do something else as well. So i was like ok bring it on ((yeah most of the time that's my attitude)). I thought she was talking along the lines of singing, because that's what i mostly do in the church, but before i knew it the work SKIT was in my face. I have done skits before, but i was just surprised to hear the word. So i was like yeah i'm up to it (and yes i'm pretty pumped about the skit too).

But then she said something about writing our own skit? Well i really am not the most creative writer, but yet again,,, its like,, bring it on. haha. So i sat down to my computer and began writing a skit, and i came up with something to go with the theme. I don't know if its a good skit or not, i haven't run it by my youth leader yet, but even if we don't use it (((( which i would be fine with)))) I'm pumped i wrote a skit.

So to sum up the last couple of days in one word,,,,, PUMPED! lol but i'm going to get off here, and enjoy my morning coffee ((which keeps me alive)) and M&Ms.

bored and blogging

It's 4am, and i am still up,, i really need to get my sleep schedule back. So as you know there is not much to do when the house is sleeping, so here i am again, bored and blogging.
Not much new has happened since my last post, i did get a new song of the week, which is AMAZING(check it out), and i had a reassuring talk with my boyfriend tonight. No not the jealous kind where i'm asking him all these questions about other girls, "would you dump me if she came on to you". We had a conversation with much more meaning than that, to me anyway.
We have been dating for about four months now, and He has called every night from the start ((you know teens and their phones)). Most of the time it's either that mushy talk about who misses who more, or just random things about our day. But tonight the phone call was about God. As you know God is very important in my life, and dating other Christians is important to me as well. I knew he was a Christian and we would talk about our youth group activities and occasionally about our lessons. Tonight we talked about what we loved about being a Christian, and just basically just gave our testimonies to each other. I just thought the whole convo was sweet, and just let me know more than ever that God is the foundation of any relationship we will ever have. I'm not saying we are super serious or anything, as I frequently remind you i am just a teen, but it is just nice to know that my boyfriend(for now) and my good friend (forever) is as serious about God as i am.
My brother is also spending the week,,,,,,,,,, whoopee (it'd be nice if you'd read that sentence with the lovely voice of Ben Stein). It is so awkward, we are not close at all. It's hard to find things to talk about, and frankly I'm not too sure if i want to. Every time we get close he does something stupid, like be a druggie. I want to be close, but i don't want to get hurt. So right now all i can do is pray, and see how this relationship turns out. Pray for him, and me as well.
And last topic, but deff not least. I'm going on a trip with my youth group Friday, so I'm pretty pumped. I'll let you know how it went when i get back, which i'm sure i will be using the words insane, crazy, and amazing a lot.